Men’s fashion: You are going like the way it feels/looks/your experience with our store
Women’s fashion: He’s going to like the way you look. It doesn’t matter if you’re uncomfortable or hate it. It’s the price of fashion.
The fashion industry still show–very clearly–the patriarchal society of old. A time when women were literally dependent on a man’s approval, when attracting a man and him being pleased with her meant the difference between life and death. Pleasing a good man was a survival mechanism. Women couldn’t survive on their own.
We aren’t there anymore, ladies.
So why are we all still focused so damn much on earning his approval?
Why does most fashion advice focus on him liking what you wear verses you liking what you’re wearing, that you feel amazing in what you’re wearing. Why do we focus on trying to get his eyes to light up instead of focusing on styles that make our souls light up.
I saw a post the other day discouraging a certain style because some people might like it, but since taste varies, you can’t count on a guy liking it. Because apparently their taste in our clothes still matters more than our own fucking opinion.
In a time when women earn their own damn money, buy houses, run corporations, hell, you can have a baby on your own. And yet we’re still reduced to heirloom fears of not attracting a man because of our clothes.
Heirloom fears/beliefs – fears and beliefs handed down from generation to generation, like a priceless broach.
Except that no one wears broaches anymore. So we keep it in a drawer. And yet we still wear the fears of a time when we had to make sure to not displease a man.
We obsess over our words in case they might offend him, instead of just saying what we need to say in a straightforward and fair way.
We follow fashion advice that all starts with “He’ll like it if…”
We twist ourselves inside out trying to please men, as if they all even liked the same thing.
This isn’t our grandma’s generation. Our options are ENDLESS. ABUNDANT.
Which means we don’t have to settle for jumping through hoops to get a guy’s attention.
Instead, we are free to be our amazing, fabulous selves, the kind of woman that a man can’t get out of his head, because we’re genuinely not like anyone else out there. There’s no book they can read to explain why we do what we do, because we’re writing our own lives. There is no strategy they can try that will keep our attention. There is no tricks they can pull over on us. We’re so in tune with what we want, that they only way they can stay in our lives is to be a legit match for us. They don’t get overwhelmed by us, because we have so many passions, interests, important things in our lives that they don’t get all our attention all the time. We’re so confident in what we have to offer and our worth that when they do get our focus, we’re present and grounded and the connection with them is incredible. It’s a soul connection.
Stop living in the past, badass babes. Stop living in the heirloom broach fears of being dependent on a man’s approval for survival.
Because the ironic thing is that not being dependent on his approval is actually the fastest way to earn his approval.
He knows exactly who you are, what he’s getting, what he needs to do to keep your attention, and in THAT, you skyrocket his attraction to you.
There’s no attraction in TRYING to earn his approval.
So enjoy your newfound freedom. Walk with your head held high. Wear whatever makes you feel amazing and sexy. Speak words with ease and confident.
Be you. Be attractive. Be magnetic.